Missing Children On Mother’s Day
The LORD is near to those who are discouraged; he saves those who have lost all hope.
Mother’s Day is coming soon — maybe too soon for some of you.
At times there can be serious issues between a mother and her child, and it can be devastating. If your relationship with your child is characterized by heartache, this is for you.
Whether you have a child who is struggling with addiction or mental illness, or your child is far away for other reasons, celebrating Mother’s Day can be particularly difficult.
Mothers on this type of journey don’t look forward to Mother’s Day. I know. I’ve been there.
On days like Mother’s Day, I don’t want to live just for today, I want to live in the past. Special memories flood my mind from when my son was little and wanted to cuddle in my lap. He adored me back then.
But those days are over. We can’t go back. We’re in a new place on the parenting journey — one of grief and loss, of shattered dreams, of letting go.
Dear Heartbroken Mom, there is someone who can help, whether your child takes action to make positive changes or is no longer physically with us.
I don’t know if things will change for your child — only God knows — but until that day, be comforted by this: God sees you. He understands. He cares. He feels your pain, and He is close.
Ask God to give you the strength you need to take steps toward healing.
Don’t let grief overwhelm you this Mother’s Day. Here are some things you can do to help soothe your aching heart:
Lower your expectations. This prepares us for less hurt and disappointment if things don’t turn out the way we hoped.
Change your traditions. Make plans but do things differently. Do something you enjoy even if you do it by yourself or with a friend.
Express your feelings. Permit yourself to let it out. If you need to express sadness, create the space to shed tears. If you’re angry, write a letter to your child expressing everything you want to say. Holding back your feelings only hurts you more in the long run.
Repent and experience grace. We all have done things as parents that we regret or wish we had done differently. Thankfully, the Lord’s grace and mercy meet us in our repentance. If you feel like you have been holding onto shame, confess that to the Lord, repent, and ask for forgiveness. And then receive it! Make amends if it will not cause harm to your children. Follow the leading of the Abba Father and rest in His grace.
Shift the focus. Take time to remember what you can be thankful for and practice gratitude. Instead of being overtaken by grief, do something for someone else or volunteer for a cause you care about. Helping others can naturally help you improve your mood.
Make an appointment with a professional. If Mother’s Day is a trigger of deeper issues like anxiety or depression, schedule some time to work through your pain and anger.
Seek out others in a similar situation. Find out if there are support groups in your area or gather people you know to start a group for mothers who have difficult relationships with their children and mothers who have lost their children. Finding an understanding community can put you on the path to healing.
Always remember who you are: God’s beloved child. God loves you with a deep, unconditional love. You are His unique creation. You’re beautiful and precious in His eyes.
Remembering My Son – Jelani 1996-2023 – Forever 26
©Wanda Currie
Vision of Recovery believes in and practices a non-denominational Christian perspective on Addiction Recovery/Mental Health Care. Vision of Recovery integrates biblically based information with coaching and counseling interventions to treat the whole person: Spiritually, Emotionally, and Physically.